Pages From Her Diary

 I read something today that quietly caught me out. A writer — Kritika — wrote about the particular silence of posting something into the world and watching it collect exactly zero reads. That weird, specific heaviness of it. And her conclusion stayed with me: that the reader was never really the point of writing at all. That the person who gains the most from a piece of writing is not whoever reads it — it's the one who wrote it. I sat with that, and then I looked back at the last few weeks of my own evenings, and I felt a little exposed. Because what have I been doing? Berlin. Ved. Light Yagami. One after another, these long late-night posts dressed up as "character analysis." And tonight it's obvious, almost embarrassingly so: none of them were ever about Berlin or Ved or Kira. They were about me. They were me, sitting alone in a city I don't like, taking the mess in my head and quietly bullying it into sentences until it made some kind of sense. Berlin was jus...

So the film spiral I fell into didn't stop at Money Heist One reflection leads to another — that's how it goes when a new city leaves you with too many quiet evenings. Berlin had me thinking about  how  to live, about romancing the moment even when the moment is a strange town and a borrowed flat. And then, almost by accident, the algorithm threw  Tamasha  at me. Imtiaz Ali, 2015, Ranbir and Deepika. A film I'd watched years ago and shrugged off as "nice songs, slow story." I put it on as background noise while eating my dinner. I did not eat much dinner that night. Because this time — and I keep coming back to this,  the second watch is where the real film hides  — I wasn't watching a love story. I was watching a man I recognised. And I didn't like how much I recognised him. You know the setup. Ved meets Tara in Corsica, and they make a beautiful little pact: no real names, no real stories. For one week he gets to be anyone he wants — funny, wild, dramati...

  Two weeks in Bangalore now. Two weeks, and the city still feels like a borrowed jacket — right size on paper, but it just refuses to sit on my shoulders the way Mumbai did. The traffic doesn't make sense, the roads loop into themselves, and every evening the same thought rings in my head — yaar, yeh apni jagah nahi hai . People keep telling me it grows on you. Maybe. For now it just sits on me, heavy, like an unwanted guest who has decided to stay for dinner. So I did what I always do when a place refuses to feel like home. I went back to something that does. I opened Money Heist again. Funny thing about watching anything a second time. The first time, you are a slave to the suspense — racing ahead, eyes glued to what happens next , who lives, who dies, which mask falls when. You swallow the story whole and miss half of it. But the second time, the suspense is gone, and suddenly you have eyes for everything you blew past. The plot stops mattering and the details start scream...

  Five Lines That Stayed A 2 a.m. reading of Kevin Kelly's "68 Bits of Unsolicited Advice" — and the five sentences that refused to let me sleep. It is 2 a.m. The fan is on. The city outside has gone quiet. And I am doing what every adult swears every night they will stop doing — scrolling through old bookmarks on my phone, hoping something I once saved will turn out to still be worth saving. Most of it is junk. And then I tap on a link from months ago: "68 Bits of Unsolicited Advice" by Kevin Kelly — sixty-eight short sentences from a man on his sixty-eighth birthday, written by someone who has clearly travelled vividly and paid attention. Out of all sixty-eight, only five stayed with me by sunrise. These are the five. 1. "When you die, you take absolutely nothing with you except your reputation." I read this and thought of every Indian funeral I have ever been to. The same plastic chairs, the same quiet uncle with the register, the same con...

                       I am not who I think I am I am not who you think I am I am who I think You I think I am The concept of Looking Glass self is a sociological theory that describes how our perception of ourselves is shaped by the feedback we receive from others. According to this theory, we develop an understanding of ourselves based on how we believe others perceive us.this blog is an attempt to  explore the concept of Looking Glass self, its relevance in today's world, and how it affects our interactions with others. What is Looking Glass self? Looking Glass self is a theory developed by Charles Horton Cooley, an American sociologist in the early 1900s. Cooley suggested that we imagine how we appear to others, then use the reactions of others to our appearance to form an opinion about ourselves. Essentially, we are constructing an image of ourselves based on how we think others see us. Relevance in today's ...

Speechless ! As I finished reading the book “ Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom , I could only marvel at the way how the book represented life lessons thru experiences it kind of made me question my own life made me cry and left me in awe . I just couldn’t get over a line from the book …” The truth is, once you learn to die , you learn how to live : which formed a trigger for today’s blog …. Death is a topic that many of us tend to avoid or fear. It is the ultimate unknown and final destination that we cannot escape. Yet to many of us it’s a taboo subject even though it impacts our lives. Scientifically speaking, death is the end of our physical body. It is a natural process that we cannot control. However, spiritually, death is seen as another dimension, and we are not just our body or mind but something more. Despite this perspective, death still brings grief and loss to those who are left behind. The first layer of death ("la muerte chiquita,") is when we become aware o...

So thats all team for the day, as my Manager concluded the team meet. A quick glance at the watch it was past 10.35 pm, wrapped up in a jiffy to dash out of the office building.  The walk outside the lane off to the road always fascinated me .. tall buildings lit up beautifully in the backdrop of the sky and the exquisite Powai lake gleaming in the reflection of the lights is a treat of the eyes and soul !!   Built around the serene Powai Lake, with scenic lake view residences, abundant greens, wide roads, vibrant energy.. Powai’s reputation precedes itself as the most desirable neighborhood to call home. A childhood dream to reside in this beautiful place which I had always nurtured . The lake looks majestically beautiful during dawn & twilight hours and ofcourse it's the mountains that i see each day as I walk out of my office building always fascinated me and would get me in to the day dreaming mode !! A dream house in the midst of this beautiful place to settle do...

In our society, we often shy away from openly expressing love. We treat it as an obscenity, something to be whispered and hidden away. We fear that saying the word too often will lessen its power, as though we instinctively understand its weight and meaning. But love is not just a word. Love is action . It is the willingness to be gentle, patient, caring, and understanding. It is the ability to put aside pride and self-interest for the one we love. It is the willingness to bear our most vulnerable selves and entrust them to another, knowing that they will be tender with our delicate hearts. To truly love another, we must first love and understand ourselves . It is only then that we can choose to love another, to challenge them to be a better person, to help each other heal, grow, and encourage each other. Love is not just about the butterflies in our stomachs or the feverish infatuation we feel in the beginning. It is about creating a safe haven for each other's hearts and being w...

"Why doesn't this girl speak her mind" ...Rahul kept checking for her reply. He called up his close friend, Nikhil and shared the entire happenings to him. Nikhil after a patient hearing was also of the opinion that the girl's take matters in this situation. So, there was no option but to wait for her reply. Meanwhile, at home things were moving at a different speed which made Rahul all the more uncomfortable. He knew anything that he would say will be held against him. " Even I too think that we need to meet up again before we take a decision " ... finally a ping from Shruti. Now, this got him relieved to some extent.  " Sure, I am glad even u think so, but as you must be aware, our parents have already made plans to take this forward " . So we need to inform them too.  There was a silence from her side, Rahul was now sure that she has no say in these matters at home. A big psyche of AM from the parents perspective is if the boy wants to me...

Wasn't this edgy even when I gave my exams and interviews ...Rahul was in an array of thoughts as he drove back home. He wanted to make an honest impression on the girl, the sight of her father dashed all of that ...and all her dad had to say was a stoic " Hi".  Why is this process of Arranged Marriage highly flawed, all he wanted to create a soothing atmosphere for both so that they can bond well but now he was not sure how the scene at her home would be ...did he commit a mistake by asking the girl out without parents consent !? Will it cause trouble for her? He was genuinely rattled. Mom had already sounded him off that the girl's parents were quite orthodox and now if they come to know that not only he met the girl secretly but also landed right in front of her dad ... well, hell would break loose... Thoughts kept swirling in Rahul's mind as he was imagining the chaos at home if Shruti's dad would call up home and update about their meeting...

The scene at home was as expected .. just after an exam, parents would ask how was the paper, will you pass, etc ..this event was no different. Questions were being gunned at Rahul as soon as he reached home. He was quite cheesed off with the questions being hurled at him by his parents about the meet ." How did you find the girl, what did you all talk, what do you think the girl will say yes?  " Now how do I know a girl in a first meet in an hour? Rahul found it too stupid to answer these questions. Mom's next question...hope u all ate something. Yes, we had coffee. Only coffee? Yes, at Starbucks, coffee costs Rs 600. Mom fell silent, and Rahul added on ..by the way, she paid for her coffee. Mom was shocked, she felt this didn't sound too positive .her expressions said it all. After a while, the interrogation stopped. Rahul had this habit of capturing the happenings on his notepad, perks of being a blogger. Glances on my cell To see her ping... ...

Love Marriages …A lot has been written about these time and again ...boy meets girl, love at first sight, parental opposition, triumph against odds, blah blah  ...the clichéd stories & outcomes! Let's spare a thought for an age-old institution of Arranged Marriages….Like every ancient stuff, these too have undergone a world of change from yester years. Gone are the days where parents used to arrange the match and the boy n girl get hitched. Well, today there is a complete makeover ....it's quite quirky, fascinating, practical and at times quite funny too. An arranged marriage is not the diktat it once was. It has evolved over the years into a meeting of mutual consent between both parties.  My parents, products of an arranged marriage, had outlined the same process for me as well.   As parents, their pressures are too many  ...education, raise the child to be independent and self-sufficient. And now to get married was their last major responsibility. I ...

So here we are...celebrating yet another  माँ    Day. Social media and posts are buzzing with the 24×7 selfless gigs of ತಾಯಿ which is a  template repeat of each year. Cards, gifts, treating our mom to a nice restaurant ...everyone's bucket list for celebrating this day is ready. For most of us, this is our way of showing appreciation and thanking them for making us a part of this world and for taking care of us and our homes and preserving our memories..every victory and heartbreak. But is it ok to acknowledge mom just a single day!? Seriously, I wonder. So, why don't we do something special for  आई  today ...for all the moments she so curated for us day after day. Let's look at HER bucket list and gift her,... HER LIFE . For all the things that she wanted to do, let's not limit the gifting and celebrations to a single day. Spend some time with her each day, Ask her how her day was, learn from her a favorite recipe & cook for her, help he...

Hmm… How do I make her watch a movie? Ayan’s mind was racing at the thought. Naina always comes up with a totally different perspective. After a lot of deliberation, he thought of something unusual to pass of the entire movie to her in "triggers". He dialed her after a couple of days. “Hey Naina, just get ready your first wish to see a movie on this Saturday” Ayan told her excitedly. “Oh, it's a surprise, that you remembered “ Naina chided him. “I will pick you up from your office”  said Ayan. “Sure, I will wait for you. Better be on time if we are to watch the full movie “ she laughed. Saturday . Ayan got ready before time and reached Naina’s office. He was determined that everything should be as he decided, even reaching on time. Naina was pleasantly surprised though she didn’t mention it.  As they drove in the Uber, they chatted happily. Am really stumped by your this wish Naina, I kind of expected you to say “ I wish I c...

The wait ends ... Ayan deferred his 2  client meetings just to be with Naina, somehow he kinda liked the time spent with her and the fun repertoire they had. Despite his best attempts, he reached the place a good thirty minutes behind of schedule. Oh ! so Naina's taken up a project at this Orphanage, he was not at all amused! He walked in and asked for Naina the official directed him towards the music room. As he walked towards it, he could hear Naina's singing and children singing along.  He stood at the entrance and watched her. Wow! She just seemed sexier. She wore a red dress with a Santa cap to match. Her pearl necklace added charm to her face, her hair up in a bun with a couple of stray strands falling on her face. As the song ended, children rallied around her as she spoke to them. There's one thing common among these children which Ayan noticed  - a big bright smile. "Hey Naina, Am sorry am late. But just in time to hear your song. Imagi...

2 months,1 week, 4 days -  Life for Ayan  was busy  juggling work  and his various personal projects with a tunnel vision focus  of “ life ko set karna hai by 40” Somehow Naina featured in his head off & on. There was something angelic about her and no matter how much he tried,  Ayan could not get her off his head. As he lay on  his couch browsing  her cell number thinking how she would react if he called; will she even remember me ? He rolled over the couch  with these thoughts …down to the floor ! He smiled and thought “ Now this must be Falling in love “    Ok enough of this thinking . Off to sleep!! “Hey, today is the meeting with the HR head, have no clue what the new assignment  he’s gonna doll out to us “ said Ayan to his colleagues. “Hi Team, as a part of our Company’s CSR, I want you to please check out a few places with whom we can be associated with.The HR head announced. Omg, such a...